Loving the Skin We are In

There has been a lot of love for natural beauty floating around on Facebook recently. This is a topic that, as a woman with a mama-body, I am excited to see flourshing. You might have noticed that this is one of my topics d'importance, as I have written about it a few times; you know if it is that important, it must be somewhat personal...and it is. I am hoping my children are free from the mind-blech that negative body image influences can have. The following are bits collected to be shared...widely. Hugs to all of your beautiful bodies.

Vitamin G Health & Fitness: glamour.com
Shared via AddThis


The Shape of a Mother

Body Image Once Again

My daughter loves my belly. She hugs it, pokes it, pats it, zerberts it, cuddles it, pinches it, and checks-in with it throughout the day and at night. She likes to have as much contact with it as possible. It has become her teddy bear, her blankie, her lovie, if you will.

My daughter has also recently discovered and learned to identify her own belly. Now her own belly brings her joy. It is a tender sweetness that fills my heart as I watch the sheer thrill on her face as she lifts up her shirt, points to and rubs her beautiful toddler belly. How I long to preserve this love for her knowing that, in our culture, the odds are stacked against that preservation.

I know that the cultural change for my daughter starts with me. As she kneads my pizza dough belly and then rests her cheek there, I wonder if she remembers her first home. I wonder if it feels or sounds familiar to her. Those wonderings remind me of the fact that she grew in my body. My body fed her, kept her safe, and soothed her for many months. And after she was born, my body continued to feed her, keep her safe, and soothe her. Those are powerful thoughts that bring powerful feelings of awe and respect for my body that I had not experienced prior to having children. I have written about postpartum body image in the past; I suspect this topic will surface again in some other form in the future. What a gift of self-appreciation my children have given to me. I am glad my daughter continues to remind me.

Be Nourished has an upcoming workshop on pregnancy and postpartum body image. I know it will be a fabulous workshop because I know Hilary (one of the co-facilitators), and she is a fabulous person. If you know her, you know what I am talking about.

Belly, Body, Baby and Beyond: A Body Image Workshop for Pregnant or
Postpartum Women (1 day) This workshop is designed specifically for the changes women experience during pregnancy, childbirth, and postpartum. It is in this delicate time that we connect with the power of nature to create new life. We watch our body change, prepare ourselves for what is needed, and as our identity shifts, it can impact our ability to care for and know ourselves. Discuss how we can use this time to create a healthy, lasting image of ourselves. This workshop will be co-facilitated by Dana and Hilary (who is expecting her first baby April 20th). Cost: $125.00 Sunday, March 15, 10:00am- 4:00pm Zenana Spa and Wellness Center 2024 SE Clinton Street Portland, OR 97202 To register please click here.

Postpartum Body Image Ideas Part 4

Move your body to gain respect for the marvelous capacity it holds.
Continuing the series on postpartum body image...

Moving your body can be deeply healing. When you move your body, you experience it in different ways and on different levels. It can be freeing, relaxing, and cathartic. OHSU describes the benefits of dance therapy:

"helps improve body image and self-esteem, decrease fears, express anger,
decrease body tensions, reduce chronic pain, and more."

A local dance/movement therapist, Chelsea Harper, integrates movement with counseling in her business Moving to Balance. She notes, postpartum mothers can be overwhelmed by so many changes happening so fast and suddenly finding that their old ways of thinking and processing are not accessible anymore. Sometimes it is the waves of hormones, the lack of sleep, the intense focus on another being, or any number of other changes, but familiar patterns of coping with change may not fit into this new system. Turning to the body to “think for you” can be one way to honor and integrate a new postpartum body image, whether it is through more active movement or relaxing practices such as meditation. Trusting the wisdom that this new body holds can help postpartum mothers to find comfort and strength when it’s most needed.

Kristy Rose Leech at Rosehips Doula Services is starting a movement group called Mothers In Motion. She writes that dance and movement can be healing for postpartum in the following ways:

• to safely and comfortably reunite with our bodies


• to identify and release tension


• to develop movement patterns of greater efficiency and expression


• to listen and reflect our body-mind wisdom


• to socialize with other mothers


• to cultivate acceptance


• to experience freedom of movement


• to expand our movement vocabulary
  

There are many dance and movement classes in Portland, and many options with a postpartum-specific focus. Kristy recommends clarifying what you want or need: a bonding experience with your child (which has added benefits) or time alone, a "work out" or restoration, to meet other mothers, a class with music or a quieter atmosphere, and so on.

Several places offer dance/movement therapy or classes with a postpartum focus:

• Mothers in Motion, contact: Kristy Rose Leech, 503-997-5260, kristyleech@hotmail.com
• Moving to Balance
• Moving Through Center
• Zenana Spa and Wellness Center
• Estatic Dance in Portland (not specific to postpartum)
• Studio Nia (not specific to postpartum)

Postpartum Body Image Ideas Part 3

Nurturing each other...

The postpartum mother can be celebrated and honored in similar ways that the pregnant mother is attended to in blessingway ceremonies and showers.

A postpartum celebration of the mother could be a tradition started among friends or family of women gathering to pamper the new mother with maybe a foot bath, back rub, and nourishing food. It could be a space to allow the mother to process her birth experience, share any new parenting challenges, or ask for advice or support within the safety of the circle of caring women. It could be a way to bring back the community spirit of the days when villages raised children together and mothers were supported by many postpartum. It could be a time to celebrate the mother body and nourish the mother emotionally.

You can promote positive postpartum body image by starting this tradition or something similar with your community of women.

Postpartum Body Image Ideas Part 2

Continuing with the theme of nurturing your mama-body image...

Another idea is to embrace your new form and work with it until you find a groove. Your clothes will probably fit you differently even if you are the same weight as you were before pregnancy. You may find that you are still wearing your maternity clothes for months after you have your baby. That is often a very difficult and unexpected experience for new mothers. Finding a few new clothing items or accessories can help you to refresh the maternity clothes or integrate your old wardrobe with your new form. A new hair style or just a trim can lift your spirits; there is something light and freeing about a fresh haircut. Going to get a haircut will get you out of the house and give you some time to yourself. Getting a facial, manicure, or pedicure can also be a way to pamper your body

These suggestions came from a recent experience I had. Apparently, up here in north Portland, Heather at the Parlour is working scissor magic. Over the course of about two weeks, I ran into several mama friends who were radiating. The discussion I had with them was so similar it was striking; they had each recently gotten a haircut and said, "I haven't felt attractive since I had [child's name], so I let Heather do whatever she wanted."

Getting out to go shopping, get a haircut, or spa treatment is challenging postpartum. Baby carriers can make a world of difference in being able to get out with your baby. A lot of stores around town have slings, wraps, and other carriers. Milagros has a wide selection of baby carriers and they can help you figure out which one will work best for you. They also host a monthly meeting of the local babywearing advocacy and support group.

You can make a date of getting out with a friend who can help hold your baby while you try on clothes or get your haircut. Ask your hair stylist to schedule a bit of extra time in case you need to stop to nurse or soothe your baby. Zenana Spa and Wellness Center in SE has a special focus of pregnant and parenting families. They offer a full service spa as well as many wellness services such as lactation services, doula services, acupuncture, hypnotherapy and more; they have a wonderful on-site childcare room. Or you can try to schedule the appointment when your partner, friend, or family member can stay home with your baby.

If you do not have the financial resources you can go to clothing swaps or exchanges, Naked Lady Parties are happening all over town...you could talk a friend into hosting one. The 100th Monkey Studio has an event that is a clothing exchange with special twist of altering. You can ask a friend, your partner, or family member to pamper you with a manicure, pedicure, or facial.

Postpartum Body Image Ideas Part 1

Earlier this week I wrote about postpartum body image and accepting the changes in our bodies after pregnancy. One mother, who wrote to me in response to the original post, stated that she loves her body more now than she did before she ever got pregnant because of the awe she feels towards her body's capacity for creating and sustaining her children during pregnancy and postpartum through nursing. I thought it was a beautiful viewpoint so I wanted to share it.

As promised, I have some ideas for nurturing your mama-body.

I want to note that acceptance may be a process, particularly because a woman's body continues to change for a time postpartum and postpartum is a time of much giving, little receiving and we often neglect our physical and emotional needs. Also because in our culture, one has to fight the negative self-perceptions which arise from being exposed to media images (which are actually touched up and not even real) and unhealthy standards in our society.

Here is the first idea...

Make the time, on a regular basis-weekly or once a month, to get a massage. Healing touch can be a powerful way to experience your body and promote an emotional reconnection. Allowing someone else to care for your body, especially if you experience that person as nonjudgmental and affirming, can facilitate integration and acceptance of your new body form. Although there is benefit from getting out of the house to go to an appointment, many massage therapists are willing to come to your home, which can save you time from being away from your baby. You can arrange the massage during a time that your partner or someone else could take your baby for a walk so that you will have a peaceful environment. If finances are a barrier, a gentle back rub from your partner or trusted friend could be an alternative.

Even if you are several years postpartum but still struggling with accepting your body, a massage can be a helpful part in working towards acceptance.

We have two massage therapists at Nurture, Sarah Dykes and Tiffany Ueltschi.

Postpartum Body Image

In the winter 2008 issue of Brain, Child, in the Nutshell column, Elrena Evans shares information that she found on the recent glamorization of the pregnant body and the resulting negative impact this has had on postpartum body image. Evans reports that in American culture, the pregnant body is sexy while postpartum women want to show no trace of having been pregnant. She writes about asking Jessica Smartt Guillion, Ph.D., an epidemiologist, why, "...pregnant bodies are in but postpartum bodies are not." Smarrt Guillion's response is that the pregnant body is "fetishized by the media at the moment, without acknowledgement of the physical impact of childbearing on the body." This short article really got me to thinking...

So many changes occur in our bodies during pregnancy. This is also true postpartum. Changes continue for months and sometimes throughout the first year or more depending on breastfeeding, etc.

A negative postpartum body image can contribute to low self-esteem and postpartum depression, as well as a host of other negative emotional and societal effects. It can also cause a mother to diet which could potentially be detrimental to her infant if she is breastfeeding as well as contribute to postpartum depression symptoms from lack of nutrients and calories.

I cannot count the number of times I have heard mothers of young children say, "I have felt so unattractive since I had my baby." We need to reclaim the "mama body" and celebrate it as an image of strength, warmth, and beauty. How can you proudly embrace your mother-body? How can we as a society promote positive postpartum body image? One mother, Bonnie Crowder, hosts a website called The Shape of a Mother. It is dedicated to honoring the maternal body throughout pregnancy and postpartum. She has been collecting and posting photos to celebrate the normal, healthy mother body. Seeing pictures of mother's bodies that are not altered by surgery or other severe measures to return to the before pregnancy state is a start.

Throughout the week I will be posting ideas to nurture your new mama body.

Nurture will be hosting several workshops in June, one of which is focused on reconnecting with your body postpartum. Check back for more details soon!